Monday, August 31, 2009

The Land That Made Me, Me

If you knew how much work I put into stealing this post from an e-mail you would look at it out of kindness. I never worked as hard writing my own post as I did putting this together. I hope it brings back a few memories.


MEMORIES

Long ago and far away, in a land that time forgot, Before the days of Dylan, or the dawn of Camelot.
There lived a race of innocents, and they were you and me,

For Ike was in the White House in that land where we were born,
Where navels were for oranges, and Peyton Place was porn.

We learned to gut a muffler, we washed our hair at dawn,
We spread our crinolines to dry in circles on the lawn.

We longed for love and romance, and waited for our Prince,
And Eddie Fisher married Liz, and no one's seen him since.

We danced to 'Little Darlin,' and sang to 'Stagger Lee'
And cried for Buddy Holly in the Land That Made
Me, Me.



Only girls wore earrings then,and 3 was one too many,
And only boys wore flat-top cuts, except for Jean McKinney.

And only in our wildest dreams did we expect to see
A boy named George with Lipstick, in the Land That Made Me
, Me.
We fell for Frankie Avalon, Annette was oh, so nice,
And when they made a movie, they never made it twice.

We didn't have a Star Trek Five, or Psycho Two and Three,
Or Rocky-Rambo Twenty in the Land That Made Me, Me.


Miss Kitty had a heart of gold, and Chester had a limp,
And Reagan was a Democrat whose co-star was a chimp.

We had a Mr. Wizard, but not a Mr. T,
And Oprah couldn't talk yet, in the Land That Made Me, Me.

We had our share of heroes, we never thought they'd go,
At least not Bobby Darin, or Marilyn Monroe.
For youth was still eternal, and life was yet to be,
And Elvis was forever in the Land That Made Me, Me.


We'd never seen the rock band that was Grateful to be Dead,
And Airplanes weren't named Jefferson , and Zeppelins were not Led.


And Beatles lived in gardens then, and Monkees lived in trees,
Madonna was Mary in the Land That Made Me, Me.


We'd never heard of microwaves, or telephones in cars,
And babies might be bottle-fed, but they weren't grown in jars..


And pumping iron got wrinkles out, and 'gay' meant fancy-free,
And dorms were never co-ed in the Land That Made Me, Me.


We hadn't seen enough of jets to talk about the lag,
And microchips were what was left at the bottom of the bag.



And Hardware was a box of nails, and bytes came from a flea,
And rocket ships were fiction in the Land That Made Me, Me.


Buicks came with portholes, and side shows came with freaks,
And bathing suits came big enough to cover both your cheeks..


And Coke came just in bottles, and skirts below the knee,
And Castro came to power near the Land That Made Me, Me.


We had no Crest with Fluoride, we had no Hill Street Blues,
We had no patterned pantyhose or Lipton herbal tea
Or prime-time ads for those dysfunctions

in theLand That Made Me
, Me.


There were no golden arches, no Perrier to chill,
And fish were not called Wanda , and cats were not called Bill.


And middle-aged was 35 and old was forty-three,
And ancient were our parents in the Land That Made Me, Me.


But all things have a season, or so we've heard them say,
And now instead of Maybelline we swear by Retin-A.
They send us invitations to join AARP,
We've come a long way, baby, from the Land That Made Me, Me.


So now we face a brave new world in slightly larger jeans,
And wonder why they're using smaller print in magazines.
And we tell our children's children of the way it used to be,
Long ago and far away in the Land That Made Me, Me.




AND NOW: For those of you too young to remember
Bob Hope, ask your Grandparents!!!
And thanks for the memories............

Give me a sense of humor, Lord,

Give me the grace to see a joke,

To get some humor out of life,

And pass it on to other folks

13 comments:

Tabor said...

Thanks, Darlene, as I have not seen this treat. Some were a 'little' before my time, but I still remember them!

Joy Des Jardins said...

All your hard work paid off Darlene...this came out perfect! I remember most of this....what a great stroll down memory lane. Thanks sweetie.... Love, Joy

Ugich Konitari said...

Darlene,

You know what, I can actually relate to some of these things, because I used to read about them in English movie magazines then :-)

Great post...

Anonymous said...

Ah, but, Darlene...you and I could remember the 1940s when skirts were above the knee! (That was before Dior took over.) Great posting. Thanks!
Cop Car

LadyLuz said...

Brilliant, Darlene. I recognise many of these, even as an English lass born in 1941.

Rain said...

Funny and so true. It was worth your work. We rewatched Dirty Dancing last night which was supposed to be coming of age in 1963 which is about when I did and I was amazed, as I always am, how much has changed in attitudes. It's good to remember how it was though once in awhile. I took an email test not long ago and the oldest category was older than dirt which is right where I came in as I remembered it all.

Betty said...

I loved this post! Good job.

Darlene said...

*Tabor - Funny - a little before your time and a little after mine. ;-)

*Joy - Glad you could identify with the times.

* Ugich - It's a small world after all.

*Cop Car - Yes, I caught that. During WWII every thing was scarce (Including fabric) and our skirts were above the knee.

*Lady Luz - It was before your time, but some things didn't change.

*Rain - If you are older than dirt, what does that make me? ;-(

*Betty - We can post about something besides health care reform, can't we? He He!

Nancy said...

Darlene,

This was terrific and I related to most of it....

What a fun read, from first line to last.

Whatever effort you made to publish this, it was WORTH IT....

Thanks!

Looking to the Stars said...

I loved every word of this! What a wonderful post. My heart ached knowing, never again will america be like this. Thank You, for the memories :)

kenju said...

You must have worked for hours on this one!! I got the same email and I loved it. It's nice to see it again.

Darlene said...

*Nancy - I go back before the dial phone. Egad! How old can thee get? (Quoting Shakespeare.)

*Looking to the Stars - Thanks for recommending this post.

*Kenju - Sigh! You are so right!

Lydia said...

This was great! Of everything pictured and written about it was "Little Darlin'" that got me, because that was my mother's and stepfather's song. I have happy memories of our young family dancing in the kitchen to that one.
Thanks for all the work it took to put this together because it was a real treat!