Sunday, July 1, 2012

Sad news

This has been  a sad week for me.  My son, Mark, returned home from work last Thursday evening and found his wife, Karen, lying dead on the floor.  My daughter, Gail,  is with him now, but must return home tonight to go to her part time job tomorrow.  Her new boss was understanding and that was a blessing because she has only been on the job for two weeks.  I am not going to California where Mark lives because he has a lot of support and I would just be in the way.  


I am a native of Colorado Springs and I doubt that there is a single person who has not heard about the terrible fires raging in my home town.  I have been trying to place exactly where the fires are, but I think they must be near the Garden of the Gods and I grew up very close to that area.  It is such a devastating disaster that it is difficult to comprehend.   I have a dear friend from childhood living in the West side and her partner has emphysema.  I can only imagine how the smoke is affecting him.  He is on oxygen all the time and this must make breathing the air very dangerous for him and for others with breathing problems.  I will try calling my friend tomorrow to get more on the spot details.

My oldest daughter was sent a series of pictures and they tell a story of a massive tragedy.   Click to enlarge.







I hope the President is speedy with disaster aid for those poor people who have lost everything. 





23 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh, Darlene, how sad for your son. I am so sorry to hear of the tragedy. It can't be easy for you, either, to stay away when you know he is hurting so badly. It must have been a very difficult decision for you.

Anonymous said...

Sorry, Darlene. The above comment was left by me.
Cop Car

Darlene said...

*Cop Car - Thank you. I offered to go, but Karen's daughter will be there tomorrow and there is nothing I am physically able to do to help. I am sure that my daughter is a great comfort to him and she has been helping him get the house ready for callers. They are very close, I am happy to say.

ellen kirkendall said...

I was sorry to hear of your family troubles. What an awful thing for your son to experience, and how sad for you.

joared said...

Darlene, I'm so sorry to hear about the death of your son's wife -- must have been quite a shock for him. My sympathies to you, too. Glad your daughter was able to go to his side. Can understand your determining you best stay in AZ for now. Perhaps your availability for support as he needs it later will be most valued. My experience after my husband's unexpected death was to receive much attention in the beginning, but the next year or two as some abruptly ceased contact in my life was really when I most needed the support.

Glad your daughter's new employer has been so understanding to allow her to take time to be with her brother during this time.

I do hope you're able to have comfort for yourself during this time, when you're not present with the family.

joared said...

I meant to tell you also, how sorry I am about the Colo. fires. I have family in Ft. Collins. Have had family in Boulder area, Colo. Springs -- know the area from time spent there through the years -- also Garden of the Gods, Pikes Peak. So tragic and so many homes lost -- so far few lives. I do hope your friends are safe and well -- surely there are those there who would look out for their welfare.

Sylvia K said...

My dearest Darlene! How heartbreaking for your son and for your family!! You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers! It has been so sad and terrifying to see the horror in Colorado! I'm sorry to have been out of touch for so long -- blogging problems that took a while to get taken care of and then I lost a number of addresses and finally found yours again through Suranga's blog!
Take care!

Sylvia

Betty said...

So sorry about the death of your son's wife. I know how difficult it is to stay away. But, you're right, if you are physically unable to help, you might be better off going later on.

I have cousins living in Colorado, but don't know how to get in touch to see if they are all right. I do know they live in the thick of things.

Anonymous said...

Re: "I hope the President is speedy with disaster aid for those poor people who have lost everything."

In the USA, the theory of help in disaster is that the nearest people address needs until the needs outstrip their resources at which point the needs are kicked up to the next geopolitical level with a plea for assistance. Thus, each neighborhood takes care of itself to the extent possible, then calls in the City, County, or Tribal Council. If county resources are outstripped, a plea goes to the next level - the State in the case of Independent Cities or Counties. The Governor of a state or the top level of a Federally-recognized Tribal Government must request a disaster declaration from POTUS to receive aid.
But wait: A request does not necessarily mean that aid is forthcoming. Certain criteria must be met for POTUS to issue a declaration. Further criteria must be met before specific types of aid may be proferred (assistance to governmental units, assistance to individuals, assistance to farmers, etc.)
If someone wishes the Federal Government to step in, they should encourage their local officials (and then their State officials) to do their part. (As someone from FEMA said in a meeting the other day (paraphrasing): "When someone tells me that they want Federal help, I tell them to call their Governor."
Cop Car

Rummuser said...

My heart felt condolences on the death of your daughter in law Darlene. I sure hope that the fires are brought under control soon and that relief is provided rapidly.

Darlene said...

* Ellen Kirkendall - Yes, it was awful for my son. I will go when my son has a 'celebration of life' service for Karenas that's when I can be of some help.


*Joared - Yes, it was the same for me, too. As I just wrote to the above comment, I will go later when I will be needed more than now.

*Sylvia K - Thank you for your thoughts and prayers.

I have not been a good blogger for months, Sylvia. I will try to be better so my address will appear on your blog. I have been a lurker, but have not taken the time to comment.

*Betty _ Yes, I agree that it was best for me to stay home until I can be of some use.

I hope your cousins are safe,

*Cop Car - Thank you for the valuable information. I know you are an expert on disasters and on what to do if you are in one.

Rummuser - Thank you for your condolences.

Yes, the country is burning up. There are many fires raging and the heat wave has broken over 100 records in the U.S. (And the naysayers claim that climate change doesn't exist.)

Rain Trueax said...

Sorry to hear of his loss and your family's. Was this shocking or a long term health problem.

Darlene said...

*Rain Trueax - It's always a shock, even when it is expected. I will tell you about her health problems when we see each other next time. My son was in shock for about 48 hours before he could function at all and I am so glad my daughter was there to help him.

naomi dagen bloom said...

As so many of those of us who care about you have said, know that I too offer my condolences for your family's sad, sudden loss. -naomi

Darlene said...

*naomi dagen bloom - Thank you.

Jack Jodell said...

Darlene,
So very sorry to learn about the unexpected and tragic loss of your daughter in-law, and of the devastation your home town is facing. My thoughts and best wishes are for you at this sad time.

Darlene said...

*Jack Jodell - Thank you for your kind words.

One Woman's Journey - a journal being written from Woodhaven - her cottage in the woods. said...

Darlene, i am so very sorry for you and your son. So pleased your daughter could be with him.
My heart is heavy for you and yours...

Darlene said...

*One Woman's Journey - Thank you, Ernestine. My daughter is home now and Mark is alone, but is doing okay.

Xtreme English said...

Just getting to see this now. So very sorry about your daughter-in-law and also about the horrendous fires burning in your hometown. That's a lot for anyone to deal with. Please take care of yourself.

M.E.

Nana Lorena Royer said...

Darlene, I add my condolences to the others. I feel for your family. We plan to be in Tucson 10-15 of October, if nothing interferes, and hope to see you again.

Leslie Parsley said...

Just seeing this and, oh my, what sad news. I'm so profoundly sorry for you, your son and the rest of both sides of the family. I totally agree with joared that it's during the couple of years after such a tragedy when the survivors really need love and support from family and friends.

The photos of the Colorado Springs fire are a graphic reminder of just how devestating these kinds of fires can be. I don't know if much could have been done to prevent a fireball such as this but I do know that the drastic austerity measures city officials have taken, with the backing of citizens, certainly didn't help.

Joy Des Jardins said...

Oh Darlene...I'm sorry to be so late in sending my condolences for the loss of your son's wife. Please accept my deepest sympathies at this very sad time for your whole family. Bless you all... ~Joy