Friday, August 14, 2009

Abbott and Costello

Be sure to read Nancy's story on the Elder Story Telling Place today. AS usual when Nancy writes a story you will find yourself laughing loud and long. Here's the link:

http://www.timegoesby.net/elderstorytelling/2009/08/the-dinner-party.html

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Some days I feel this way about my computer. It's beyond comprehension. Even the techies can't figure out what's wrong. Can't live with them and can't live without them. What to do?


You have to be old enough to remember Abbott and Costello, and too old to REALLY understand computers, to fully appreciate this. For those of us who sometimes get flustered by our computers, please read on...
If Bud Abbott and Lou Costello were alive today, their famous sketch, 'Who's on First?' might have turned out something like this:
COSTELLO CALLS TO BUY A COMPUTER FROM ABBOTT

ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?

COSTELLO: Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my den and I'm thinking about buying a computer.

ABBOTT: Mac?

COSTELLO: No, the name's Lou.

ABBOTT: Your computer?

COSTELLO: I don't own a computer. I want to buy one.

ABBOTT: Mac?

COSTELLO: I told you, my name's Lou.

ABBOTT: What about Windows?

COSTELLO: Why? Will it get stuffy in here?

ABBOTT: Do you want a computer with Windows?

COSTELLO: I don't know. What will I see when I look at the windows?

ABBOTT: Wallpaper.

COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software.

ABBOTT: Software for Windows?

COSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I can use to write proposals, track expenses and run my business. What do you have?

ABBOTT: Office.

COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything?

ABBOTT: I just did.

COSTELLO: You just did what?

ABBOTT: Recommend something.

COSTELLO: You recommended something?

ABBOTT: Yes.

COSTELLO: For my office?

ABBOTT: Yes.

COSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office?

ABBOTT: Office.

COSTELLO: Yes, for my office!

ABBOTT: I recommend Office with Windows

COSTELLO: I already have an office with windows ! OK, let's just say I'm sitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal. What do I need?

ABBOTT: Word.

COSTELLO: What word?

ABBOTT: Word in Office.

COSTELLO: The only word in office is office.

ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.

COSTELLO: Which word in office for windows?

ABBOTT: The Word you get when you click the blue 'W'.

COSTELLO: I'm going to click your blue 'w' if you don't start with some straight answers. What about financial bookkeeping? You have anything I can track my money with?

ABBOTT: Money.

COSTELLO: That's right. What do you have?

ABBOTT: Money.

COSTELLO: I need money to track my money?

ABBOTT: It comes bundled with your computer.

COSTELLO: What's bundled with my computer?

ABBOTT: Money.

COSTELLO: Money comes with my computer?

ABBOTT: Yes. No extra charge.

COSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much?

ABBOTT: One copy.

COSTELLO: Isn't it illegal to copy money?

ABBOTT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money.

COSTELLO: They can give you a license to copy money?

ABBOTT: Why not? THEY OWN IT!

(A few days later)

ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?

COSTELLO: How do I turn my computer off?

ABBOTT: Click on 'START'.............

12 comments:

One Woman's Journey - a journal being written from Woodhaven - her cottage in the woods. said...

Darlene, dropping in to visit you.
You make me smile. Take care.

Darlene said...

*One Woman's Journey - You too, Ernestine. Thanks for the visit.

Sylvia K said...

What a great memory your post brought! Always got such a laugh out of Abbot and Costello! Your post gave me another big laugh and we can always use one of those.

Have a great weekend, Darlene!

Sylvia

Joy Des Jardins said...

I've always loved Abbott and Costello....I could just picture them doing this, and the exasperated look on Costello's face. Too much. Thanks Darlene. Hugs to you...

Ugich Konitari said...

That cracked me up. Great post.

Darlene said...

*Sylvia - Thank you and I hope you are out taking more of your fantastic pictures for us this weekend. Enjoy!

*Joy - Hugs to you, too.

*Ugich - Thank you.

20th Century Woman said...

Darlene, thanks for the memory. That was great.

Friko said...

Arrrrgh! Too right. here's one who is pretty hopeless; as you say, too old to really understand the beasts, but can't do without one. I have a mac, an easy one for idiots like me.

Love Abbot and Costello, always have done. pretty much dates all of us.

Darlene said...

*20th Century Woman - I'm glad you enjoyed the memory. 'Who's on First' is a classic and take-off's on it are fun.

*Friko - I think everything dates me now. ;-)

Looking to the Stars said...

Darlene, I love Abbott and Costello. This was great, a modern day "Who's on First" Great Post :)

My computer is always doing something wierd!

Darlene said...

*Looking to the Stars - Computers can be the most frustrating beasts ever invented, but we can't live without them.

kenju said...

I love that one. Where computers are concerned, I am just like "Who's on First!!"